I've got sand in all the wrong places

Lisa Scottoline

Book - 2016

"Lisa and Francesca are back with another collection of warm and witty stories that will strike a chord with every woman...You will identify with these tales of guilt and fall in love with them and fierce (grand) Mother Mary."--

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Subjects
Genres
Humor
Published
New York : St. Martin's Press 2016.
Language
English
Main Author
Lisa Scottoline (author)
Other Authors
Francesca Scottoline Serritella (author)
Edition
First edition
Physical Description
306 pages : illustrations ; 22 cm
ISBN
9781250059956
  • I've Got Sand in All the Wrong Places
  • Lisa
  • Fighting Like...
  • Francesca
  • Little Black Dress?
  • Lisa
  • Ho Ho Ho
  • Lisa
  • Not a Creature Was Stirring
  • Lisa
  • Auld Lang Sayonara
  • Francesca
  • Changing Tide
  • Lisa
  • Love Match
  • Lisa
  • SWF Seeking Tamiflu
  • Francesca
  • With Apologies to Mother Mary
  • Lisa
  • The Storm Has Passed
  • Lisa
  • Swipe Me Tender
  • Francesca
  • Requiem for a Meal
  • Lisa
  • People of Earth
  • Lisa
  • The Quitters Club
  • Francesca
  • Spanked
  • Lisa
  • Advice to a Young Tradeswoman, Written by an Old One
  • Lisa
  • How Much Is a Tracksuit?
  • Francesca
  • Doggie Dramz
  • Lisa
  • Mommy's Day Out
  • Francesca
  • Celebrity Crushed
  • Lisa
  • This Is the Pits
  • Lisa
  • Judge Doorman
  • Francesca
  • Got Limes?
  • Lisa
  • I Saw the Sign
  • Lisa
  • Incident Report
  • Francesca
  • Laugh at My Pain
  • Francesca
  • It's Not About Me
  • Lisa
  • Mother Mary Flunks Time Magazine
  • Lisa
  • Barbarians at the Frontgate
  • Lisa
  • Milestone or Millstone?
  • Lisa
  • Topping the Leader Board
  • Lisa
  • Upgrading the Macaroni Necklace
  • Francesca
  • The Amazing Disappearing Middle-Aged Woman
  • Lisa
  • Bachelorette Bouncer
  • Francesca
  • Tan, Don't Burn
  • Lisa
  • Protect the Candle
  • Lisa
  • Unhappy Madison
  • Lisa
  • Breaking and Renter-ing
  • Francesca
  • Spaghetti and Salad
  • Lisa
  • Holiday FOMO
  • Francesca
  • Game of Thrones
  • Lisa
  • Facets of a Stone
  • Francesca
  • This Call Is Being Monitored for Quality Assurance Purposes
  • Lisa
  • A Thing of Beauty
  • Francesca
  • Over Troubled Waters
  • Lisa
  • Party Hearty
  • Lisa
  • Rings of Love
  • Francesca
  • Thanks for Asking!
  • Lisa
  • Looking at My Garden
  • Lisa
  • Pop Goes the Pill
  • Lisa
  • Those Who Can't Date, Set Up
  • Francesca
  • Empty Nesting for Experts
  • Lisa
  • Empty Nesting for Experts, Part Two
  • Lisa
  • Undefined
  • Francesca
  • Everything Old Is Nude Again
  • Lisa
  • The Unofficial Wedding Party
  • Francesca
  • My Brain Hurts
  • Lisa
  • Mother Time
  • Lisa
  • God Gave You Two
  • Francesca
  • In the Soup
  • Lisa
  • Look Out! There's a Feminist Behind You
  • Francesca
  • Muted
  • Lisa
  • AARP, or American Association of Retired Pets
  • Lisa
  • They're Playing My Song
  • Francesca
  • To Error Is Human
  • Lisa
  • Conditional
  • Lisa
  • Dog Must Love
  • Francesca
  • The Godmother
  • Lisa
  • Friendship on the Flip Side
  • Lisa
  • You Aren't What You Eat
  • Lisa
  • Acknowledgments
Review by Booklist Review

Crime writer Lisa Scotttoline and daughter Francesca (Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat?, 2015) team up for the seventh time in this compilation of brief, entertaining essays. Summer, according to Lisa, is a time to wear mental flip-flops, and this collection is ideal for sampling between slathering on sunscreen and dozing in a beach chair. Once again, topics come from all directions. Lisa muses on pets, a dead mouse in her travel cup, middle age, mother Mary, adult children, Larry David, and, of course, Bradley Cooper. Francesca counters with dating websites, bachelorette parties, torn corneas, and moms. Most of the pieces are deceptively light and witty, but just when the book veers into the fluff territory, Francesca writes of being assaulted. Her frank depiction is frightening, and the strong bonds between mother and daughter are clear in the aftermath. Insightful commentary on aging, relationships, pop culture, and family lies beneath the humor, and the combination of viewpoints (along with Scottoline's popularity and the success of the other volumes) will give this collection wide appeal.--Smith, Candace Copyright 2016 Booklist

From Booklist, Copyright (c) American Library Association. Used with permission.
Review by Publisher's Weekly Review

Scottoline, a prolific and bestselling thriller author, is joined again by her daughter, Serritella (the two write a column for the Philadelphia Inquirer called "Chick Wit"), for this warm and engaging seventh volume in their series. The duo discuss everything: their many pets, Scottoline's embracing of the empty nest, and Serritella's Manhattan doorman, who grades her boyfriends. Scottoline, nearing 60, has learned the joys of having time to get together with her best friend and do girls' nights with her horse club, and of perfecting the art of saying no: "It took me fifty years to figure out what I was doing wrong and how to fix it." She is liberated now that her life no longer looks like a to-do list. But not all is light-hearted fun, as when Serritella writes about being mugged and assaulted near her home in the summer of 2015. She's shaken by trauma but also experiences kindness from strangers who come to her aid and locate her glasses, and from the police who stay with her all night and accompany her afterward when she walks her dog. Family is a perennially popular subject, and Scottoline and Serritella bring wisdom and laughs to make sure it never gets boring. Agent: Molly Friedrich, Friedrich Agency. (July) © Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.

(c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved
Review by Kirkus Book Review

More light, bright essays to delight fans of this mother-daughter writing team.For those unfamiliar with Scottoline and Serritella's previous books (Does this Beach Make Me Look Fat?, 2015, etc.), this collection offers a gateway to their humorous, breezy style, featuring rapid-fire paragraphs and plenty of sarcasm. Though the book's title and its July publication date point to this little book being seen on beaches across the country, Scottoline explains that though "you might be reading this book in the summertimeit chronicles a whole year in our lives, both the good and bad, beginning with the holidays, both the naughty and the nice." While Scottoline manages her menagerie of pets and her own life in the suburbs of Philadelphia, Serritella explores life in Manhattan. Scottoline explains the book is the seventh in a series, in which "Francesca and I have written about our lives alone and together, as mother and daughter. We're ordinary and normal, and the more you read about us, the more you'll see your own life and your own families reflected herein." The short, snappy entriesfew longer than three to four pages, with most paragraphs featuring only one or two sentencestouch on subjects as varied as dating, aging, pets, Manhattan doormen, panic attacks, and the perils of book tours. Throughout, the authors shine a positive (some may say overly positive) light on life's bumps, surprises, and quandaries. Part of the charm of these essays is the way both women use humor to turn negative topicse.g., receiving occasional hate mail, surviving a mugging and assault, contemplating the thought of dyinginto moments of humorous and sensible reflection. A collection to dip into from time to time, sure to please fans. Harried book-club members will appreciate the brevity. Copyright Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.

Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.