The Asperkid's secret book of social rules The handbook of (not-so-obvious) neurotypical social guidelines for autistic teens

Jennifer Cook, 1975-

Book - 2022

"Being a teen or tween is tough for anyone. And if you're on the Autism Spectrum, life can feel like a game you're playing without knowing the rules. Jennifer Cook knows - she's been there! Her internationally bestselling handbook is the key to unlocking those unwritten, often confusing, not-so-obvious social guidelines and bolstering confidence, all at once. Finally, teens can play the game of life with instructions. The 10th Anniversary Edition of The (Secret) Book of Social Rules reveals the essential secrets behind the baffling social codes surrounding making and keeping friends, dating, and catastrophic conversation pitfalls, with all-new content on social media and talking about neurodiversity. It's no wonder... Jennifer's is the navigation tool tens of thousands of fans have come to love! Full of brand-new funny illustrations, take-it-from-me explanations, and comic strip examples, this Book of the Year award winner is real, positive, and speaks from the heart (without ever sounding like your mother's guide to manners). It's confidence, humor, and smarts. For the Human Spectrum." -- Amazon.com.

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Subjects
Genres
Young adult nonfiction
Self-help publications
Published
London ; Philadelphia : Jessica Kingsley Publishers 2022.
Language
English
Main Author
Jennifer Cook, 1975- (author)
Other Authors
Tim Stringer (illustrator)
Edition
Tenth anniversary edition
Item Description
Previous edition: 2012.
Physical Description
300 pages : illustrations ; 23 cm
Bibliography
Includes bibliographical references (page 300) and filmography.
ISBN
9781787758377
  • "Where Was This Book When I, Like, Needed It?"
  • Name Calling
  • Introduction: Rules, Posers and Speaking a Foreign Language
  • Need-to-Knows
  • What You Need to Know About Making Sense of the Rules
  • 1. How Not to Make a Light Bulb: Why Everything Is Hard Before It Is Easy
  • 2. The Potty-Training Rule: Knowing When a Thank You Is Expected
  • Quotealicious
  • 3. I'm Sorry: The Hardest Words to Say
  • 4. The "Perseverance" of "Perserverance": Being Right vs. Being Included
  • 5. Perfectly Imperfect: Congratulations, You're Human
  • 6. But I Wasn't Laughing: Laughing with You vs. Laughing at You
  • Quotealicious
  • 7. Poof! You're Interesting!: Being Interesting by Being Interested
  • 8. Mirror! Mirror!: Reflect, Reflect, Reflect
  • 9. You're Welcome: The Power of Compliments
  • Quotealicious
  • 10. Broken Spaghetti: The Benefits of Thinking Like a Wet Noodle
  • 11. Boiling the Pasta: How to Make that Flexible Thinking Thing Happen
  • 12. You've Got to Hold the Pillow
  • 13. Take a Breath and Watch the Hammer: Knowing How to Handle Criticism
  • 14. Speak in Sandwiches and Make Suggestions: Knowing How to Give Good Feedback
  • Quotealicious
  • 15. Unfiltered: White Lies and Trust
  • 16. Tact and the Triple-Filter: How Honest Is Too Honest?
  • 17. Literally?: What They Actually Mean
  • 18. Do I Need an Umbrella or an Ark?: Sorting Mountains from Molehills
  • 19. Temper, Temper: There Will Be More Apple Juice Tomorrow
  • Quotealicious
  • 20. The Science of a Greek Goddess: Hygeia, Aphrodite and Why They Were Such Good Pals
  • 21. Traveling by Bubble: Transparent Boundaries That Only NTs See
  • 22. Choices and Tactics: How to Recognize a Friend
  • 23. Who's Who, What's What: Friendship Levels and Cling Wrap
  • Quotealicious
  • 24. Leveled Up: Dating, Flirting and Just-Friends-Ship
  • 25. Standing Up Straight: Self-Advocacy, Anger Band-Aids and Being Heard
  • 26. Talking to Myself: Inner Dialogues and Old Tapes
  • 27. Likes, Tweets and Texts: Netiquette Need-to-Knows
  • 28. There's More for Dinner Than Mashed Potatoes: Missing the Bigger Picture
  • 29. Wedgies, Tattletales and Bullies: Taking Your Power Back from Bullies
  • 30. Through the Looking Glass: Laughing at Yourself without Being a Laughing Stock
  • Stickies (Little Nuggets of Truth-Sticky-Note-Sized)
  • Practice Sessions
  • Stick a Fork in It-We're Done: AKA The Conclusion
  • References
Review by Kirkus Book Review

Cook, herself autistic, offers tips for neurodiverse readers. Incorporating candid personal anecdotes, the author examines how common autistic tendencies--among them perfectionism, difficulty giving and receiving criticism, and a lack of tact--can inadvertently cause neurotypical peers to form negative impressions. To mitigate social gaffes, she thoroughly explains the rationale behind such social subtleties as white lies, reflective listening, and how to helpfully frame critiques, among others. Each chapter, introduced by a black-and-white cartoon illustration and a list of main points, accessibly breaks abstract concepts into actionable behaviors. Charts and sample dialogues demonstrate such skills as distinguishing between insensitive and tactful responses to awkward questions. Practice sessions in the form of short, comic strip--style vignettes invite readers to apply these skills by spotting strengths and weaknesses in characters' interactions. Importantly, though the author doesn't sugarcoat the negative effects of social blunders, she encourages readers to be gentle with themselves. Unfortunately, generalizations occasionally mar her advice. For instance, she discourages befriending popular, attractive, and charismatic people, claiming that they would find readers disposable--a rigid presumption that contradicts her encouragement of flexible thinking. However, readers will appreciate her logical approaches to curbing catastrophic thinking, defusing meltdowns, recognizing trustworthy friends, engaging in self-advocacy, and more. While readers may not need--or agree with--every tip, the wide variety of topics ensures that they'll find useful strategies for almost any challenge. There is some racial diversity in the illustrated figures. An earnest, well-mapped guide to neurotypical customs. (references) (Nonfiction. 13-18) Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.

Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.